bluesky

163crows

joyfuladorable

Gary, a slug with human-like legs and fleshy wings stares agape in the top right corner with the caption Live Gary Reaction to two young women kissing. The woman on the right, Laika, is a tiefling in dark clothing who holds aloft Maeri, a shorter woman with dark skin and white and gold clothing who cradles Laika's face in her hands as she bends her head down to kiss her as hearts pop up above their heads.

@damesanddragons Hannah Culbert said "Laika and Maeri kiss" and added a full 10 years to my lifespan. Thanks <3

rad-rat-with-a-tophat

inneskeeper

kill the shift manager in your brain

inneskeeper

you are not wasting time you are vibing. you are not being unproductive you are literally chilling. make a grill cheese with cheddar cheese and slather a piece of the bread with some honey and maybe you'll relax

inneskeeper

Innes Keeper's Formula For Fantastic Grilled Cheeses
(for nearly no extra spoons!)

Are you hungry? Do you have a hankering for grilled cheese sandwiches like, way more than a normal person maybe? Great news! I am about to give you the secret knowledge I stole, like Prometheus himself, from the Akashic Records—to bring back to Prudencia! And I’m even doing it without a ten hour long lecture about how the Akashic Records makes me think of idfk, 9/11, and how that relates to sandwiches.

I will, however, briefly say this: You gotta trust me when I say cooking grilled cheeses via this formula WILL grant you Bloodborne Insight. There is no fucking reason that making a grilled cheese this fucking delicious should be this fucking easy. I feel like I’m cheating God every time I do it because it takes (nearly) no extra spoons. And here’s where I show you why.

Scientifically Proven Perfect Extremely Easy Grilled Cheese

INGREDIENTS — SEASONINGS
-butter, i usually use 2 or 3 tablespoons per sandwich
-garlic cloves, I use 3 usually
-a source of heat, like red pepper flakes, or szechuan peppers
-a source of spice OR a source of sweetness, such as dijon mustard or honey. slather that motherfucker on a slice of your bread.
-a source of herbiness, such as oregano, thyme, sage, rosemary, etc in any combination that goes well together or on its own. if someone tries to tell you that you need it fresh, they’re fucking lying, the 2$ crushed powdered sage is fucking great. experiment with other spices such as ground turmeric if you're spicy

INGREDIENTS - THE METAPHORICAL MEAT OF THE SANDWICH
-two slices of bread per sandwich. this is actually a massive influence on your sandwich taste and texture as a whole. a basic white or wheat will still be fucking delicious because like I said, I stole this from the Akashic Records cookbook section and found it under “fucking perfect grilled cheeses forever”. However, if you CAN—getting bread like brioche, texas toast, brown bread, rye, or sourdough will make a sandwich already being elevated super easily to “pay 23 dollars at a fancy restaurant” level of elevation.

-one to three types of cheese per sandwich. you can get away with one type but really try for two or three if you can swing it.
this is also one of those massive influences over the sandwich—listen, i know, that’s obvious, but stay with me—what matters
isn’t the SPECIES of cheese, it’s the TYPE of cheese. getting the deli at your local Safeway or Walmart or whatever and asking for the cheese they gotta cut (or just in general the fancier, better-quality cheeses) is literally the only major requirement that I ask of you. If you are on SNAP/EBT programs, me too, and I promise you: Please do this. Please trust me when I say do not get the cheap Kraft-type cheese because it’s less money. I know it’s a bit extra but it’s only a bit to get like 1/4 or 1/3lb and you have no idea how much I’m actually getting a little emotional about this, because the “rice with butter and beans or top ramen every single day” life is soulsucking and sickening and it is genuinely one of the greatest sources of suffering
to human beings I can imagine, I’m serious. Following this formula will genuinely change your life/mental health just a bit because you know that you have one meal that is super delicious, super filling, pretty damn cheap when it comes to how much you get, and super easy to make on days where the idea of doing more than just 15 minutes MAX is gonna make you wanna die.

super sorry for that paragraph btw i just really cannot overstate how this is a lifechanger especially when youre poor/low spoons/depressed. delicious food makes me not be as depressed. this is that.

METHOD

Take garlic cloves and crush them either with the meat of your palm or the flat of a knife or literally anything that would crush good. Take bread slices and put a source of spice or sweetness if you are using one. take a pan and put it on the stove on low-medium heat (aka a 2 out of 10).
Place the butter in the pan, as well as the garlic cloves, the source of heat, and the source of herbiness. Congratulations you have now literally done ALL the extra effort that you need to make a grilled cheese like this. That’s it. No extra dishes. No fussing with amounts or chopping or whatever. That’s it.
The butter will melt in the pan and soak up the delicious ingredients that you also put into the pan. Take each slice of bread and place it in the pan to butter it, OR just take one slice, place the cheese on it, and then put the other bread on. It’s really just a matter of extra effort.
When the bread is in the pan, turn it up to medium heat (5 out of 10) and just sorta let it sit for a bit. When you can see the cheese start to get visibly melty—or when you vibecheck it—flip it once and just do the same thing.
When you’ve grilled your cheese on both sides, take it out of the pan and put it on a plate (or just a paper towel to save on dish spoons. btw paper plates and plastic utensils are a fucking godsend if you hate dishes and/or can’t do them very easily/takes a lot of effort.)

That’s literally it. I really hope this helps.

poggay

outta my way gayboy im making this sandwich

poggay

oh. oh my god. holy fuck. what. how. why. this is delicious. i kinda burned my bread and my cheese didnt melt all the way but it's still the best thing ive ever tasted?????

tiredshadowscale

oh my god. this is so fucking good. the butter melting and absorbing the spices and herbs already smelled amazing, but then i threw the bread on and it started smelling EVEN BETTER. then i took a bite. holy FUCK this is better than sex. i legitimately believe that Innes Keeper stole this shit from Prometheus, there's no other way to explain why this is so easy to make, yet so FUCKING good, other than cheating a god.

inneskeeper

I didn't steal it from Prometheus he's my trophy husband!

strawberrocket

ok me and my partner went back and made this. exact words upon eating were “we’ve cheated god” and “i feel like my world just got rocked” and then we were both energized to get back to drawing. proof:

please make innes keeper’s scientifically proven perfect extremely easy grilled cheese

inneskeeper

I'M PUTTING THIS ON THE FRIDGE (WHERE I KEEP ALL MY CHEESE)

blue’s saved posts

damazcuz

everyone come here and tell me something you've been enjoying recently, what are you going wild for. Hobby or friends or fandom thing or whatever, something that's making the microwave in your brain spin faster :)

mx-bluesky

my favorite podcast of all time (legendlark!) is nearing the end of its dames and dragons campaign. it’s been going since 2019 and I’ve been obsessed with it for at least half that time. it has an extremely queer cast, amazing worldbuilding, and tons of comedy. the kind that comes from a group of friends having fun together. the larks are great and they all really genuinely care about each other and you can feel it in every joke and silly voice and emotional impact moment and wild tangent. sometimes they talk about costumes for ten minutes. sometimes they go on and on about how much they hate sonic the hedgehog. sometimes Kat introduces a new character and everyone immediately rolls to fall in love. sometimes one of them starts a bit and it ends in everyone tormenting Errol. sometimes Juniper just starts talking in a silly voice. sometimes Noel tosses out a conversation topic just to watch everyone explode. sometimes they all go to hrose camp or nickname a character Strong Betty, Wolf of the Waves or traumatize bullies or try to get two npcs together or torment an old man or beat up Dashing Dawson or give a gnome emotional trauma to get him to be a good person or supersize their animal companions or fight through hell and walk across two continents just to see each other again. I love my silly little dnd podcast. I love Maeri and Laika and Fran and Falen and Corbin and Slake and Zaeroth and Lorea and Milava and Orestes and Noon and Alden and Gingie and Bae and Darius and Burgerjurger and Gaeri and Buddy and Professor Shah and Spritz the candy wizard and Almanac the kid detective and Wanda the crazy cat lady and Wilbur the con-man-with-a-heart-of-gold and Janbo (of course) and Pavilla and her girlfriend and Kai, fucked up as she is, and Varahara and Rove and Wia and Iona even though they end in tragedy and the Killoni tricksters and you know what? I love the larks more, because they create all this. with joy and humor and chaos and each other. they invite guests to join them and make them feel welcome and incorporate their sense of humor like they were always there. they run contests to let the community slip characters into their world. their glee at the fanzine was unbounded. I guess what I’m trying to say is that they have made something beautiful, and I adore that. I love it when a new episode drops, even when it’s two weeks late, because I know I can tuck myself into the tapestry of their world for one beautiful hour and listen to what is, at the end of the day, just a group of friends playing DND and having fun.

legendlark dames and dragons oh boy this got a lot more rambly than I intended. sorry uh. yeah i might be a little bit feral about legendlark just. just a bit uhhhhhhhhh. sorry. listen to legendlark blue rambles

lolotr

sillypolls

What is your url based on?

A fandom/media thing that I like

A name or nickname I go by

An inside joke

Something I like from real life (like an object or animal or something)

It's a descriptor of the kinds of things I post (like art or perhaps polls)

It's something that describes me

It's based on a phrase or quote

It's whatever first popped into my head, no real reason behind it

Other reason for it (tell me in the tags!)

show results

indirectly the song mr. blue sky by elo i go by bluesky in a lot of places bc of that song but bluesky was taken here so

firelordgrantham

the most beautiful thing with Tumblr is that we might all be insane, but we are Insane Renaissance Peops TM.

Every ''world heritage post'' will contain cross-referencing of three different fandoms or at least one mythology. We make memes about statistical outliers (a lot). We teach each other weird historical facts (about Kelloggs' original purpose, or about how the Demeter from Dracula is difficult to stir for this reason contrary to popular belief that it was for that reason, or about the australian prime minister who went for a swim, etc). We write poetry. We've created at least three new kinds of litterature (shitposts, fictional aitas and haikubot-baiting). We share art, all kinds of art, from ancient statues to last-week fanart, from furry to abstract, from videos to music...

Now imagine a worldbuilding in a book. The reader learns there is this unhinged website existing only in the book which is basically dedicated to saying stupid stuff and laughing at stupid jokes with total strangers.

And then tell the reader about how this same website taught an entire generation about what a statistical outlier is, how almost everyone on it is reading an old gothic classic novel day by day together. The absolute unity of Dracula Daily. Tell the reader about the shared knowledge of this website, about the dozens of accounts solely dedicated to pictures of old clothes or modern architecture. How it is a bastion of basically every single political party who each argue with each other in a (relatively) milder way than on the real world. Tell the reader about the popular uproar when Haiku Bot answered for the first and last time, not with an echo, but with a love declaration to an user who asked it what its purpose was. About the obsession for the victorian era. For classical litterature. Tell the reader about how this stupid website is maybe the greatest bastion of world culture there is left in this world.

And ask the reader if it is really believable. The reader will answer ''no, it is not. Because humans beings, left to their own devices, stuck in a (chat)room with strangers, will begin to kill each other. They won't create something beautiful and welcoming just because they have the opportunity to, and even if some did, the vast majority would crush this project''.

Then show the reader. Show how, under its silly pretenses of being a shitposting site, it is a beacon for all the scholars stuck in the wrong time, and for all those who live in the right one but want more freedom, and for every single person in the world who wants a good laugh but also an opportunity to see a bit of beauty.

baconator-deluxe

junkratsadstuck

here at the sandwich shop, we’ve started to notice some people who are new to sandwiches aren’t used to meat and cheese between two slices of bread. they find this practice strange and confusing. that’s why we’ve decided to cut the bread out all together. from now on, we’ll just serve slices of meat and cheese on a plate.

junkratsadstuck

we know that many of our loyal sandwich shop customers have been coming here for years to buy our delicious sandwiches. but some people don’t “get” sandwiches, and we need to try and appeal to them with an easier-to-understand meal format. we will no longer be serving sandwiches. all of our food will just be cold cuts on a paper plate. we love our customers and appreciate your understanding <3

spellcastorsugar

identitty-dickruption

someone tell the tumblerinas that you can raise an issue without deliberately guilt-tripping everyone about it

identitty-dickruption

okay, I take it back. I don’t think everyone is doing this deliberately. some of it is so deeply entrenched in tumblr culture that you probably don’t always notice you’re doing it

“nobody’s talking about this” -> you can just delete this phrase

“if you can’t reblog this, unfollow me” -> you can also delete this one

“x group can, and should, reblog this” -> remove the “should”. or you know. delete the entire sentence

your post will still spread all the important information without the guilt-tripping parts, I promise

trudemaethien

if an otherwise valid post tries to guilt trip me it’s a pass on the rb, sry.

idkanameatall

shfjdjfjsjgjskjgjs

as soon as the internet decided depression and anxiety were the everyman mental illnesses and therefore not to be taken seriously we were all fucked tbh bc the fact that i have to feel embarrassed to admit i have debilitating anxiety because people will think im just an uwu dont call me out coward is ridiculous. its insane that i have to clarify that my depressive episodes are like life threatening and not whatever dipshit dumbed down idea of depression people seem to have like oh yeah i just wanna watch netflix and eat ice cream and not text people back. like bro i think im the devil

shfjdjfjsjgjskjgjs

like maybe depression and anxiety are household names now but they do still kill people. like. theres a reason they fucking kill people.